Change requires real work.
Often times, people equate or hope to achieve personal change by altering their circumstances or by changing those whom they associate with. They seek new jobs. They pursue additional training or undergraduate, graduate or doctoral degrees. They learn foreign languages. They join professional organizations, as well as Greek-lettered fraternities and sororities as well as civic and community organizations. They also attempt to broaden their personal circles of influence by attending professional networking events and meet ups.
These steps are extremely important, but are not the most critical, and however, are actually the least of which we have control over. Ironically, the step or effort we have the most influence or control over is changing ourselves yet we avoid tackling it first, or even, at all.
True personal change seems to be the most daunting and difficult. It is like the home clean-up or repair project that never seems to ever get done or even get started. Each and every day and weekend, we procrastinate and avoid it at all costs. Something always seems to be lacking to begin. We don’t have the proper tools. We’re too busy. We need more help. It’s raining outside. We simply don’t want to deal with it because, what we refuse to acknowledge or admit is that, it frustrates and scares the hell out of us.
For the most part, real change is painful. To achieve it, it forces us to step out of our comfort zones and to explore foreign territories. Sometimes, we are also forced to arrive at, or to draw ugly, unpleasant, and unsettling conclusions about ourselves.
No one wants to admit, or least of all, accept that we were not who we thought we were. We would prefer our mirror, or our conscience, to continue to lie to us unlike the mirror to the witch or evil queen in Sleeping Beauty.
Understandably, however, we can’t out run ourselves and failing to act always catches up with us – one way or another and subsequently manifests itself in a variety of ways.
First, when we fail to do so, the change or rewards we may initially experience from our efforts become often short-lived, or are not achieved to the extent we originally intended or sought. Other people are even fooled into believing they have enacted real change and that their actions are significant, but in the end, the outcomes of their psychology or narratives are ultimately repeated again and again.
Eventually, we convince ourselves that the life we seek is beyond our reach or simply not in the cards for us since we have done our due diligence and made what we believed to be a genuine effort.
2017 © Eric Christopher Webb
The WordsByWebb blog distributes a weekly quotation and reflection every Tuesday from National Black Authors Tour bestselling author and multi-talented writer Eric Christopher Webb (E.WEBB?!) to inspire, motivate and encourage personal development of its readers. The blog also regularly shares news, updates, new poetry and excerpts of the writer’s latest work. Webb, a spoken word artist, former Washington News Correspondent for Thomson Newspapers and nationally-syndicated Soul Searching columnist, has also been featured in movies, music videos, commercials and literary documentaries on HBO, BET Weekend’s Evening of Spoken Word, BET’s Rap City, Video Jukebox, The Party Machine, The Learning Channel, Voice of America and XM Radio. He is the author of five books, including "The Garvey Protocol: Inspired By True Events," a 2013 Phillis Wheatley Book Award Finalist for First Fiction and the National Black Authors Tour bestseller, "Love Letters, Death Threats & Suicide Notes." He has also contributed to numerous anthologies, journals and magazines.
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